I don’t really do new year’s eve or new year’s resolutions, but as we had been away over Christmas, I can’t deny that it has felt like a really good time to make a fresh start…
My own new years resolutions were simple:
get my driving license
start a new journal and keep writing in it
do less work when my children are awake
and a secret one (secret because its more than likely to fail and I don’t like to publicise my failings): take care of myself better!
I realised that all four things, even especially the last one would improve my children’s day to day living. I also realised that really, my only resolution, new years or not, is to be a better mum… being able to drive, journaling our memories and my own emotions, doing less work and being more present, and taking care of myself better will all help me to be a better mum… but this also made me think about specific parenting resolutions that I want to make. And keep.
Be present every day (spend more time unplugged)
Don’t whine (especially about whining…)
Be more patient
Listen more and better. Listen intently.
Relax with my children
Cook new and interesting meals
Validate my children’s feelings [stop saying “don’t be silly, you’re just…”]
Read more (to myself and to my children)
I am going to write this list up, prettify it and stick it on the wall, so I am reminded every day – to be better – to be the best I can be for my beautiful kids.
Too many things get in the way of me being the mum I want to be. Distractions, house-keeping, anxiety, and a complex desire to create all the ideas I have right now… they need to take a back seat, they need to wait. My children are not going to wait. They are growing up Right. Now. There is not another chance to experience this wonder. These are the few short years that they need me. To cuddle them, read to them, watch them play, play with them, to hold them in my arms and in my sight every day. This is it.
and I realised that, in addition to being mindful about the resolutions above, by taking care of myself a bit more, being kinder to myself… that I will be able to focus on them. Ive kind of lost myself in trying to be a hundred different things to a lot of different people. If I find myself, even a little bit, I will perhaps creep out of the anxiety and be a better me. And a better mum.
Do you have any parenting resolutions? How do you take care of yourself when you get a chance?